Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
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