People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
whose ass print is on the piano?
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize