I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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