I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize