We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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