I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
