Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
