And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize