Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
