Already got asked if we're dating
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize
