I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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