Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
