Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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