your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
