are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
