Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
When are your genitals available?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Randomize