You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
