isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
