Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Randomize