I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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