are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
