this beer tastes like vomit already
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
