therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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