So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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