OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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