there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
