Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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