My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
