I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
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