I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
