He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
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