I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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