Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
love makes seman taste better
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
