I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
