Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
