i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
