No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
