i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize