He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
i think i just lost a toe
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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