I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
