We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
