the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
