He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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