Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize