Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
