Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
