Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize