I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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