I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Randomize