This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
