You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize