Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
