why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
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